With love - An evening of appreciation

It is 7:45 pm in the evening, and I am back after a rather tedious meeting from work. I am thinking something, and as I open the door, I see my maid still working .

"8 O clock, Shanti ammaa..? "
She looks at me, smiles and says something in tamil, which she knows I will not understand.
As I always do after I get back home, I put on the Geyser and move to the kitchen to brew some tea.
"You want some? , I ask her , To which she answers "Swalpaa kooro", meaning get me some .
As I shirk off the cups, I notice my favorite cup broken, and I ask her - How did it get broken .She pulls on the drawer and shows me how it got stuck, as she was pushing it off ,and got broken .its broken a voice in me tells me , and I say , "problem beda" , meaning no problem .
The tea is close to brewing and I am sieving her, she asks me for a chapatti (Indian bread). My first instinct is to make her a Maggi, coz that's what I would have made myself when I am very tired. But something in me tells me to stop being mean, and make her a chapatti . There is no vegetable sabji so I get her some amla pickle and pudina chatni (Indian sauce).

As I am making the first one , the power goes off, and I make both the chapattis in the dark .I am bad at making chapatti’s by the way, so this is probably my excuse to not take charge !




She smiles as I capture her, saying the light isn't enough. Somehow she always get really exited when I shoot her .

See her live in action as she helps with cockroaches here .


As she is sitting in the balcony next to my kitchen on the broken chair ,suddenly seeing her I remember my Mom, and all the time she used to feed me as I used to stand next to her in the kitchen . Most of these times, I never understood when she used to make me that extra chapatti
with the dough, which she would have had herself, and she is tired enough not to kneed the dough again, and goes on to bed with a half empty stomach. Only much later I realized to trick her by finishing the last chapatti and then asking her for me, thus "forcing" her to kneed more floor .

My sister on the other hand, was much more subtle. As I was preparing for my IIT entrance exams she used to get up in the middle of the night and make me tea and get em a little to eat.
When I was back from the classes, she used to make me food, and so was it for the evenings, till Mom got back from work. My sister in that way was my second Mom.

This wonderful lady, my maid , enables that I put my best each day learning new things and understanding the world of Mathematics and Sciences .She enables me to do more , be more.

Life is too short to complain, about broken cups, about maid asking you to cook something for her, when you are tired enough not to make one for yourself, about the cold water that you would have to take bath with , because there's no power.

Three wonderful women - My Mom, My Sister and My maid- here's a note of thanks , for I wouldn’t have been what I am today.

Footprints of Gerizim

You will know the meaning of a kiss only when you have never been kissed.

This simple realization stuck to me yesterday, when I had been to Gerizim Rehabilitation centre .

At the first sight , there was particularly nothing remarkable about Rahul. He had just been an ordinary child, but what stuck me at first when I saw him, was he wished me Merry Christmas Akka(sister in Kannada) almost four or five times that single afternoon. That was December 25th ,2009 .



Rahul is the one next to me in the picture- in White








That day, Anupama and I had been to Gerizim first. We had our inhibitions at first about how it would be to spend some time with specially abled kids. We took with us some sweets, and color books and crayons .But what was remarkable (and unexpected) was that these kids were extraordinarily disciplined .They never rose once while we are distributing the stuff, and continued to watch the movie that was being stage in the hall they were seated in.







And this is Vidya .










Yesterday, once more, we had been there. And this time with more energy that we had than the previous !
While I was playing with the kids, Vidya came to me, and as I soothed her hair, and picked her in my lap, it was appalled by the warmth she gave me and it was then that stuck me , these kids had no family , they were mentally challenged, and might not even remember us. (But I was surprised when the kids drew in thin air the signs showing coloring –as if to tell us that they remembered us from the last visit)
It stuck me that at times when we have nothing to lose, we still hold ourselves, in the tough collar, shutting ourselves out ,to what is humane .

That’s why they say –You never know what your smile does to someone, for a moment, for a day, for a lifetime of memory book – go sketch a memory book for someone .

This is something where My world of numbers and Mathematics have no meaning-Just the plain realization that we must give selflessly .

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Helping people help themselves
Ekta Grover

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~
ek

Community wellbeing: Why each of us matter

There is this interesting book, Bottom of the pyramid, at the heart of it; it doesn’t try to touch upon a newly discovered problem. It just states may be a lot better given the statistics that are very well compiled in the work.
So what the work reinstates is that the poor and the less privileged section of the society is where our future will be, and empowering these people is where we collectively as a society will be able to move forward.
Talk of Microcredit(The Gramin Bank), or eChoupal, at the core they imply a change, and a shift in focus from ME to the less blessed in the space around us.

We draw our identity from the space we live in and this is why this section should be empowered, for we do not do everything in self interest. There is an immense difference that can be made using entrepreneurial approaches to solve the problems of this miserable section. The project I am planning aims at physically impaired people, providing basic education to these people, generating employment opportunities and consulting suicidal attempt cases.

I was just exploring how we can use social media, Acting Wikily; to amplify the cause and raise funds. I do not quite believe in charity, because when you ONLY give monetary support you are feeding someone for a day or two, but when you teach him, a vocation, or provide him/her employment opportunities, you are feeding him all his life and this is my vision. To begin with, feeding 15 families an year for the rest of their lives, inculcating in them high motivation levels, and making them self reliant.
As years go by, I hope to be able to touch more lives, and hope that what I am trying to do will be simulated in the space we put up in.

In essence I wish to redefine community wellbeing and I am looking for off beat ideas in improving community service and making it exemplary, because this is what I can be my personal BEST it.

I m amazed at the amount of energy each one of us here has got with them. Given that we belong to varied backgrounds, cultures and bring varied experiences in the forum, there is a lot we can do together.
I am here to learn from you, and how do I make my project more visible, adaptable, and truly inspiring.
Yes, I need you .


If the path is beautiful,first confirm where it leads,but if the destination is beautiful,dont bother how the path is..Keep walking..

Cheers,
Ekta Grover

If common sense was so common..

If common sense was so common!

1. Cheer someone up each day.
You would have probably heard it over a hundred times, but doing this will not only make someone feel wonderful as it sets their day, but also, they according to Newton’s Third law: “Every action Has an equal and opposite reaction” , love comes back. It sure does!

2. Say a thank you even to people who do what is expected of them as a chore.
Once I had urgently needed this passport photograph for my VTU form submission (I procrastinate a lot, anyway). The staff there was initially reluctant to make it, as that would require cancelling the printer queue and reinitiating it with the first entry as mine. So when he conceded to my demands, I closed the transaction with a heart felt thank you.
No matter what profession people are in, remember that they are individuals and that they deserve equal respect as you do.

3. Listen to people

Sometimes people just want to be heard. They might not want any help from you, monetary or otherwise. Your time is most valuable asset that you are investing in them. Just hear to what they have to say without any prejudice and skepticism. And please address them by their names. All that makes a difference is this.
Every conversation is about a relationship. Make it .

4. Value your own time and others
Time is the most valuable commodity that you have. Value it, preserve it, and especially when it is others, tell them that how obliged you are towards them for it.
5. Appreciate people

Appreciate people, be it their blue color shirt that you have been eyeing, or the help that they offered you out of the way.
There is a difference between genuine appreciation, and being sycophantic. Strike that difference for yourselves, for when you lie, it does no good, and people will catch you.

6. Happiness is like a radio station, stay tuned..
Being happy is the simplest thing on earth. Because when you are happy, your energy centre creates a space where people can identify what it feels to be in your company. If you can make others “Smell you” (Economic times, Paramahamsa Nithyananda), “People around you will welcome your presence as they feel centered around you, more peaceful, unstressed and relaxed. They would want to be with you. Let them smell you and find out “.
Smiling to yourself , is the best thing you can feed your mind with each day, condition it ! Be a butterfly.
You do not have to make others happy, make yourself selves happy first, and the rest shall follow...


7. If it's over, it should get out of your mind, and if it is not, you are probably doing injustice to yourself, by running through things that matter the least to you.

People just move on in their life, and you have probably not gotten over "what was said, or done". Do not do injustice to yourself by reminding yourself about the times you were hurt. Let them be milestones instead, that shape what "ELSE" can you achieve in life.."
Do not ever allow anyone, to surpass you, and break the faith you have in YOU. YOU ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON OUT HERE, and keep reminding yourself about it, that is not to say show that off!! JUST care for YOURSELF :)

8. Substantiate what you say

Be one of those “I won’t take enough of your time, but I will leave you thinking for a while. “Because if you do not, chances are that you will be tagged with those “Chattu types”, and “Detailed bugger”. Respect your integrity, and stand by it.
Don’t divulge unnecessary details, and more so, no one is interested in what you think and say, you have to make it interesting.

9. Fight Fear and Greed, not yourself.

Find out what is it that is troubling you, better still WRITE IT, and once you find that, Shut your brains off! Go into hibernation mode, because once you go in the “Low Mode”, everything appears to be low in life.
Talk to an old friend, or browse through the old photo albums, do anything but think on what is troubling you.

10. Get high, get drunk!

Feel passionate about anything, but something, and put your heart in it. Be it sports, or dance, or your pet.
Have something that you truly care about, and let it be the be that you can back upon on a rainy day. Love gives you a reason to live, find this reason, your personal and customized reason.

Here's hoping, you find what you love :)

Stay Tuned ..

Cheers,
Ekta Grover

Breaking the Bad habits..

Breaking the bad habits..

There are very few people, who haven’t browsed through a single ‘how to..’ book.
Like many others , I have read plenty of them too; How to live 24 hours a day, how to sleep less, and have more energy than you ever had before, how to quit coffee, how to find what you need in life bla..bla..

And then there was this book, I pounced upon in the library, ‘breaking the bad habits’. So, as the ritual went, I gave it a shot. If you have read this far, it implies, that you really want to do something about the quality of life that you are living. Below are the things that worked for me , it may not work for you, let me be truthful, because the very moment we see a change, we run away, or don’t pursue it, because we are afraid of the transformation, or the flip-flop this change will bring about.

The most important aspect of any positive change that you want to bring about in your life is ‘discipline’. No matter how hard you try, your inner self, which is reluctant to change, and is cozy with the older you, will keep poking into you, ‘This is not worth it. You should live the way you want to. You are FREE’.

There are many vital aspects of life, here I am taking the most important of these ‘Healthy living’.

Every morning, we practically compete for Olympics marathon, to board the shuttle, why, because if you miss it, you would have to go through the pain of, travelling in Bangalore traffic. So if you care so much for yourself, why not get up 5 minutes earlier? I would say, get up an hour earlier not just 5 minutes. Morning is the most wonderful time of the day, a time where a freshly manufactured day is lying ahead of you, wanting you to embrace it, but each morning you miss it under your cozy blanket , and sluggish laziness. Don’t get up an hour before all your life, just 7 days, and see the wonders it will do to your energy level. Why 7, because your body clock takes time to get used to your sleeping and activity patterns. What you do with this morning is upto you, you go for a jog, meditate, walk, an innocuous tete-a-tete with your parents, or spouse, or read newspaper, or finish your breakfast on the dining table. It may seem stupid, but all this actually gives you a sense of composure and stability.

Besides if you choose a morning walk, or jog over the rest, you have a windfall. Everyone knows the fitness aspect of it, but not everyone knows that just being exposed to sunlight, gives you tremendous amount of energy to keep you charged up. Why? Melatonin is a hormone in our body, that controls the amount of sleep, and is regulated by the amount of light available to you. Most of us, also are not aware that we are taking quantity sleep, and not quality sleep, which means that when you get up after the nap, you feel as if you have been drained out of energy while you were sleeping. You can probably relate to this, because chances are that you might have experienced it. So go grab, as much sunlight as you can, if you cannot make the morning walk, at least grab some in the afternoon! And no sunglasses please!


Now, what you dread the most! Food. I know by now , I have infuriated you enough , well, you want to change my thinking paatern,sleeping habits, and now even my eating habits ! This is too much. Well, this is because , you are what you eat. So when you experience that sluggishness and inability to concentrate ,an hour after your lunch, it is due to the fact that the body consumes a lot of energy, as the food passes through the alimentary canal for digestion. So you go garb that cup of coffee and you feel , alright I m ok now. What this coffee does to you is that , being a stimulant, it urges the body cells to release the energy that it stores in layers. So not only is your body theme perturbed by this sudden bust of energy, but because it mistakenly associates this energy, with your power of being able to concentrate more, you get used to it. Coffee actually makes your thinking more linear, saying it saps your ability to think, and track back to them. so get that out first! To begin with you can replace bournvita with coffee, keep one at your desk, and have it when you feel you cannot do away with the urge of coffee. Having wheat grass juice in the morning, is the perfect way to detoxify your body.

These 7 days, should you follow it, drink loads of water(everyone tells you that ),get enough sunlight, go for that jog, eat healthy and prefer fresh fruits and fiber, replace coffee with bournvita, and tea with herbal or tulsi tea, and when ever you feel that you cannot take this further, just remind yourself, that you are doing it only for 7 days , and count the residual days. If you feel, it does you good, you know what to do with it !

If you continue doing what you are doing, you will continue to get what you are getting.

Be the change you want.

Here's hoping all good things come to you ..
Amen...


Stay Tuned..

Cheers,
Ekta Grover

Glimses of my work..

This is where I started from, poetry straight from the heart..

I sometimes, sit and wonder..Gosh I am so talented..sometimes the reaffirmation is so enthralling

~
ek