This is where I started from, poetry straight from the heart..
I sometimes, sit and wonder..Gosh I am so talented..sometimes the reaffirmation is so enthralling
~
ek
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Monday, May 19, 2008
A mother in its own right..
She plays on my lap, playfully she rubs off my cheeks, sometimes, she fights with me, when I seem not to observe her delightful activities in the play ground.
I take her for an evening stroll, in her ‘princess trolley’, and as I call her ‘Vedika’, ‘Baby’, she turns back, and smiles at me, and I give her this little blowfish kiss and she returns one back to me.
So as I take her for this stroll in the society apartments, a question dawns to me, will I be able to afford all this for my kids? Will I be able to give them the club house, the basketball court, the swimming pool, the kindergarten, or if not, will they ask me why they do not live in the big apartments, where you have these immaculately dressed children, with the most colourful robes, most of them with their nannies.
And as I think all of this, I am touched, of what my parents have made me, ‘Responsible’, I think that is the legacy I cherish the most having had from my parents.
So as I struggle, as I have always been with ‘Who am I? “, I know that I will have to answer it, and I do not have much time, and it never seems enough.
So while I sit besides the swimming pool, with her on my lap, and my feet in the cold water, and as she struggles to let her free, I sit back and wonder, what will it be like, to have my own kids, to send them to school, to sit with them and help them with their homework, and knowing that whatever may I do, will never be enough.
But after a thoughtful debate of me Vs. myself, I am convinced, I would want to give my progeny a more precious legacy, an inheritance which my parents gave me, an inheritance of ‘belonging’, of knowing where you come from, and of knowing why we were sent to this earth. Of making those special years of life, all the more wonderful and telling them, that there are ‘second bests too’, and that nothing is absolutely wrong, even a stopped clock is right twice a day.
Teach your children to fail, for every success is the revenge of failure. Let them be what they want to be, not what you always wanted to be and could never become, tell them that there are vocations besides doctors, engineers, and teach them to make mistakes, and laugh at them, for life does not come easy to all of us.
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Sooner or later they will find you…
What it feels to have your lunch all by yourself on the first day at school!
I had this feeling, that someday, someone will observe me, and ask me to join them. That never really happened. Never in school, never in college, for if we have to make things work, we and we alone have to work towards it.
If you cannot take care of your baby, no one else will.
Born to working parents, whose job required of them to travel immensely, I practically spent half my life making friends, and the other half losing them;for I possibly changed around 9 or 10 schools in my entire Academics. Somehow the feeling of trying to mingle, and leaving behind an admired set of people never left me.
Someone who has faced it will tell you how ignominious and heart rendering it is. But things never really change. Be it school, where we kind of, find comfort in ‘herd’, or be it college where we do not wish to ‘stand out’., or be it any organisation for that matter, things never really change the human psychology. The basic human heart , the feeling of insecurity never really retreats.
And then comes another face, the job, where one seeks to find like minded people and people that can gel well with.
Look around for those subtle messages that life keeps throwing.
Life keeps throwing these messages all the while, just that like a band pass filter we tend to see things the way we want them to. If the Manager says, let’s meet after lunch, when did he say,’ You are performing bad, I want to kick you!’. Now don’t tell me your heart was not pounding after lunch.
As I grew, I really admired “unfreezing, changing , and refreezing “, concept a friend told me.
Standing in a BMTC bus, I see two kids, possibly the contenders for the dirtiest kids I had come across so far. The older girl is seated by the window and repeatedly strikes the younger girl with her elbow, as the younger one tries to grab a look from the window. The younger one looks irritated, and finally retorts back hitting. Now there are two ways any child would react, either she would cry and call the mum, or she will try to fight, completely aware that she cannot win.
When we were kids we never gave up, so why do we get bogged down by life, so easily as we grow up?
Why do we lose against a bossy colleague, or an overwhelming Manager, or a demanding spouse ?
On the face of it, things do appear tough at times, but they are no different from what you have already faced, and if you fared all them the earlier ones, well, this is just the same..
Dont bother about what you do not have, or what you cannot do, but direct your enery towards the positive , and the rest shall follow..
Life doesn’t wait for you to get back to your feet, So FIGHT !
And keep Running ..Because..Stable is stagnation..
I had this feeling, that someday, someone will observe me, and ask me to join them. That never really happened. Never in school, never in college, for if we have to make things work, we and we alone have to work towards it.
If you cannot take care of your baby, no one else will.
Born to working parents, whose job required of them to travel immensely, I practically spent half my life making friends, and the other half losing them;for I possibly changed around 9 or 10 schools in my entire Academics. Somehow the feeling of trying to mingle, and leaving behind an admired set of people never left me.
Someone who has faced it will tell you how ignominious and heart rendering it is. But things never really change. Be it school, where we kind of, find comfort in ‘herd’, or be it college where we do not wish to ‘stand out’., or be it any organisation for that matter, things never really change the human psychology. The basic human heart , the feeling of insecurity never really retreats.
And then comes another face, the job, where one seeks to find like minded people and people that can gel well with.
Look around for those subtle messages that life keeps throwing.
Life keeps throwing these messages all the while, just that like a band pass filter we tend to see things the way we want them to. If the Manager says, let’s meet after lunch, when did he say,’ You are performing bad, I want to kick you!’. Now don’t tell me your heart was not pounding after lunch.
As I grew, I really admired “unfreezing, changing , and refreezing “, concept a friend told me.
Standing in a BMTC bus, I see two kids, possibly the contenders for the dirtiest kids I had come across so far. The older girl is seated by the window and repeatedly strikes the younger girl with her elbow, as the younger one tries to grab a look from the window. The younger one looks irritated, and finally retorts back hitting. Now there are two ways any child would react, either she would cry and call the mum, or she will try to fight, completely aware that she cannot win.
When we were kids we never gave up, so why do we get bogged down by life, so easily as we grow up?
Why do we lose against a bossy colleague, or an overwhelming Manager, or a demanding spouse ?
On the face of it, things do appear tough at times, but they are no different from what you have already faced, and if you fared all them the earlier ones, well, this is just the same..
Dont bother about what you do not have, or what you cannot do, but direct your enery towards the positive , and the rest shall follow..
Life doesn’t wait for you to get back to your feet, So FIGHT !
And keep Running ..Because..Stable is stagnation..
If this is best, there sure is a better!
“To know what is good, you have to know what is bad”, exclaimed a German participant at the annual Management event at IIMB.
How true, isn’t it surprising that we all run behind things wanting the best of them all, but to know what’s best on the platter you have to try everything on the menu !
So how do I know, what’s best, for every best may have a better!
I m truly convinced that there’s no such thing as “Best”, because if there had been, it had been definitive enough, and there would sure have been contenders. I remember arguing at school, to be the best, wanting to top every class test, and assignments.
I recall how my competitions used to be my mother’s competition, for a child’s mind can be moulded to think the way, its creators want it to be. In that way,I am lucky to be born to my parents.
The greatest things start in the ‘Mind’, so if there’s this something that’s best, if at all it is, it all starts in your ‘250 gm’, topping upon your head. But to realize this most of us take all our lives, better still, for some of us will, or might never now ‘What lies within’.
Look at the wonderful men and women around yourself, and think about that one thing that took them there, no it is not Education alone, for there have been as many
Failure stories as have been successes. So what is it, is it the opportunity, the exposure, the Resources, the determination and will, the Circumstances that ‘Bring out the best of all’.
Now that I have twined all the post-requisites (I am doubtful if there exists such a word, but I intend to convey, that nonetheless, these all are important. It is the knowledge of “self”, the knowledge of being fully aware of your strengths, your Weakness, and the “Rest shall follow”.
There’s this concept of Johari window which intends to map your personality traits.I am convinced that God was only trying to be fair when he made us all different, and it is up to us, to decode that message, for which we were brought on the earth in the first place.
That doesn’t mean quitting the job, being a recluse. It just means “being aware of your cards, and playing them, when your turn comes.” Find that one thing that drives you, and life will be fun, everyday!
If you cannot take care of your baby,No one else will...
If you cannot take care of your baby, no one else will.
If someone is really consequential on this planet, that some one is you, and if you cannot take care of yourself, no one else will.
Life is like opening a speciality Restaurant where your USP (Universal selling Point) is say, diet food. So you open up to the foodies who would eat out more often, if the food be less calorific. But then you realize that the food is bland, and you could make someone tempt for a desert may be, so here it comes on your menu.
Bang, Kids come along too, there has to be this extra lavishly dressed burger too, and may be if you are catering more to a particular community, you could decide to serve “specialty food” like Punjabi, Rajasthani ,or like.
So what was your USP now becomes a platter, you have everything, sure you sell and make good profits, but you have lost your identity.
This is what happens, as you set to answer the larger question, ’What shall I do with my life. “
So whist I am stuck up with the larger question, “What shall I do with my life “,I am left clue less, more so because I feel I have always wanted to be a bit of everything I can be, so much so, that it has eventually diluted what I would primary want myself be.
People say, it’s all about being at the right place at the right time, but is there really a right place? I doubt so.
I look outside the window by my bed, the cool breeze that passes by me, and by the woods I notice a boy, somewhere in his teens, dragging his body, for he cannot walk.
And a thought crosses my mind, I have a strong mind and body, sure I do earn well, I am respected at amongst my family and peers because of this white collar job , but have I made a difference yet. I do not think so.
I have come to believe that life keeps sending in messages everyday, it is up to us to tune into them, and because we do not know when that one message that will change our life will come, so we need to keep hunting.
I am tempted to quote an expert from Steve Jobs’s , CEO Apple, commencement speech here, “You cannot connect what happens to you today, but may be years later when you try to relate to it, you will be able to connect the dots backward..
Probably you remember crying for that one sweet chap in college (I cried for loads , trust me!) , or that one company that happened to be your Dream Company in college, which you miraculously could not make, or that accident just before the V day, on your much awaited blind date. Now years later, when you are settled with a surprisingly sweet hubby, a satisfying job, and many sweet dinner dates with your Fiancé , you know what I am trying to sell.
Life ends the day you feel, you are done.
If someone is really consequential on this planet, that some one is you, and if you cannot take care of yourself, no one else will.
Life is like opening a speciality Restaurant where your USP (Universal selling Point) is say, diet food. So you open up to the foodies who would eat out more often, if the food be less calorific. But then you realize that the food is bland, and you could make someone tempt for a desert may be, so here it comes on your menu.
Bang, Kids come along too, there has to be this extra lavishly dressed burger too, and may be if you are catering more to a particular community, you could decide to serve “specialty food” like Punjabi, Rajasthani ,or like.
So what was your USP now becomes a platter, you have everything, sure you sell and make good profits, but you have lost your identity.
This is what happens, as you set to answer the larger question, ’What shall I do with my life. “
So whist I am stuck up with the larger question, “What shall I do with my life “,I am left clue less, more so because I feel I have always wanted to be a bit of everything I can be, so much so, that it has eventually diluted what I would primary want myself be.
People say, it’s all about being at the right place at the right time, but is there really a right place? I doubt so.
I look outside the window by my bed, the cool breeze that passes by me, and by the woods I notice a boy, somewhere in his teens, dragging his body, for he cannot walk.
And a thought crosses my mind, I have a strong mind and body, sure I do earn well, I am respected at amongst my family and peers because of this white collar job , but have I made a difference yet. I do not think so.
I have come to believe that life keeps sending in messages everyday, it is up to us to tune into them, and because we do not know when that one message that will change our life will come, so we need to keep hunting.
I am tempted to quote an expert from Steve Jobs’s , CEO Apple, commencement speech here, “You cannot connect what happens to you today, but may be years later when you try to relate to it, you will be able to connect the dots backward..
Probably you remember crying for that one sweet chap in college (I cried for loads , trust me!) , or that one company that happened to be your Dream Company in college, which you miraculously could not make, or that accident just before the V day, on your much awaited blind date. Now years later, when you are settled with a surprisingly sweet hubby, a satisfying job, and many sweet dinner dates with your Fiancé , you know what I am trying to sell.
Life ends the day you feel, you are done.
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Loving What you do...
This job is my bread and butter.7 months back when I joined my firm , I was teaming with Ideas so gallant and ‘Out of the Box’, that I wanted to make a difference. Infact that was precisely what I did in the first 4 months, but later it died a silent ignominious dimeeath.
Now as I revist this entire process, my mind tracks back from day one, to this day...
Why can’t I feel the air, the sun shining when I am back after the walk, the moon staring behind the clouds, lovely so much so, that I have penned some odd 13 poems for a secret love, I have never known to exist.
Where is the passion that used to drive me. Perhaps the harder you start, the sooner will fatigue dawn upon you.
My friends tell me , that its no different for them. IT is boring at times, but if that be the case, what was the objective of 4 years of sweat, the VTU literally sucking out every ounce of blood, be it microprocessors, or advanced microprocessors, or computer organisation.
I sit back and wonder, now what do I do, I remember the first poem that I wrote,” Preparation before night “, and how, it gave me enough reasons to brag all to myself.(For I had already occupied a revered place amongst, the likes of Prem Chandra), and how mercilessly was it crucified under the No-Go decision for the school Mag that year, and how I had bitched about the my classmate, who edited it.
Then all of a sudden I am reminded of, how did I come here at all, this far, and how have things changed for this ‘frog in the well’, Then I remember telling Papa, that the world is very big, and that I am just a small unit here.This was when my progress reports used to go , and dad was really apprehensive of my falling grades every semester, Later I grew smart, and made sure that reports never reach where they are intended to, Thanks to my sis!
Now, I feel nostalgic, so much so, that I feel my eyes are already wet, I feel like hiding myself under the cosy blanket, so that I cannot question, “who am I”, and “If I had come here for a reason, and if that reason is not achieved yet, have I given up? ”.
There is an old saying in Sanskrit, which says,’ A deer doesn’t , by itself enter the mouth of a sleeping lion..’
I.e., not only is it important to be alive, and wake, but also, to hit when the opportunity comes.
Life doesn’t wait for anyone, it is right here, right now, so what ever it be that you want to do to it, do it now.Perhaps I am finding something, I dont know exists, or something I have no clue about...But alteast I am trying to find it, and that's important..
“Find a job that you love, or love the job that you find…”
Now as I revist this entire process, my mind tracks back from day one, to this day...
Why can’t I feel the air, the sun shining when I am back after the walk, the moon staring behind the clouds, lovely so much so, that I have penned some odd 13 poems for a secret love, I have never known to exist.
Where is the passion that used to drive me. Perhaps the harder you start, the sooner will fatigue dawn upon you.
My friends tell me , that its no different for them. IT is boring at times, but if that be the case, what was the objective of 4 years of sweat, the VTU literally sucking out every ounce of blood, be it microprocessors, or advanced microprocessors, or computer organisation.
I sit back and wonder, now what do I do, I remember the first poem that I wrote,” Preparation before night “, and how, it gave me enough reasons to brag all to myself.(For I had already occupied a revered place amongst, the likes of Prem Chandra), and how mercilessly was it crucified under the No-Go decision for the school Mag that year, and how I had bitched about the my classmate, who edited it.
Then all of a sudden I am reminded of, how did I come here at all, this far, and how have things changed for this ‘frog in the well’, Then I remember telling Papa, that the world is very big, and that I am just a small unit here.This was when my progress reports used to go , and dad was really apprehensive of my falling grades every semester, Later I grew smart, and made sure that reports never reach where they are intended to, Thanks to my sis!
Now, I feel nostalgic, so much so, that I feel my eyes are already wet, I feel like hiding myself under the cosy blanket, so that I cannot question, “who am I”, and “If I had come here for a reason, and if that reason is not achieved yet, have I given up? ”.
There is an old saying in Sanskrit, which says,’ A deer doesn’t , by itself enter the mouth of a sleeping lion..’
I.e., not only is it important to be alive, and wake, but also, to hit when the opportunity comes.
Life doesn’t wait for anyone, it is right here, right now, so what ever it be that you want to do to it, do it now.Perhaps I am finding something, I dont know exists, or something I have no clue about...But alteast I am trying to find it, and that's important..
“Find a job that you love, or love the job that you find…”
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Before You Quit !
Before You Quit..
Leaving a plush job, and setting out on the Road, is a double edged sword, if you don’t do it, You keep crying about it all your life (worse , When you are 60! ), and if you do , you always tend to rethink your decision, every time you find your self helpless, and pushing far beyond you should.
At one point of life you break, and say, ‘Ok I quit’ , if I don’t enjoy what I do, if I do not find it the least meaningful enough, then why do I go about it. I am a loser anyway, but this way if I were to quit, I would be a happy loser.
However, there a certain things that you need to be clear, and rethink, before you jump in the back water, and say, ‘I will learn to swim, someday’.
Here are some of these.
Analyze the alternatives
Before you decide to quit, have the alternatives. Be it the change of job, or your profile, the geographical ecosystem, it has to be meaningful. To the least, you should know, before and after one month of quitting the job, how do you make your ends meet, how do you earn your bread?
When will I break even, and when can I break?
The first break signifies, the Tipping point, where the venture ceases to be a self funded, the point from where one can expect the profits to come in. And the second break is, when do you say, “Boss I quit, it had all been foolish!”
How much do I need before I hit the Road?
Give yourself plenty of time, a realistic soft bound frame, to achieve this goal. Let there be Milestones, and let them be as realistic as possible, accommodating all the “What If”, or risk factors.
Do not overlook, even the slightest chance of possibilities where risk could seep into your B model.
Taking a simple case, say Mr X earns some 30 K per month, and his expenditures (The must spend-not avoidable) cumulate to 15 K a month. Assuming he has a calculated break even period of an Year, then this implies for his survival for a month he would need 15 K, so 12*15 =1.8 Lakhs is what he needs for one year to feed himself.
All in all, when you have that much money to support you till you ‘Break Even’, Quit, assuming you have done your Homework well. And you SOP is not some random out of the box, and back to the box thinking.
Is there a Gap that my ‘B Plan’/Venture/ Service could fill in, or is it just following an existing model of making money, which ‘seems’ to be a potential contender.
What are the customers needs, what my Ideal customer will be like, what will be his expectations from my service, What will differentiate me from my potential competitor, will I be my Core Competency, do I put in into a lot of things and hope something works (The Stock broker theory, as I would call it, putting your cash in different baskets, not all will/can be a loss!), or do I concentrate on one, and believe that How can it fail, if I am working this hard to get things done.
Networking
This is the key area which needs to be worked on. There are a plenty of things that can be done to spread the word around, Viral marketing, Partnering with another start up (The Barter System Theory, When you can Exchange services for service, need not be a monetary support at all) Trust me, when you are in the market, people are bound to get to notice you, provided you make your presence felt. Meeting up with like minded people and generating Ideas. Go with a fresh mind, and soon will you realise, may be, its time to rethink and put on a different Hat that you never wore for so long (The SIX thinking Hats theory , Edward De Bono)
Ideas, Never Run out of them
May be you have been thinking about it all this while, but nothing of the sort, out of the box, that’s where Stagnation creeps in, and then you know again, ‘I m Sick again’. Key in some RSS feeds, collect data from users feature request, or subscribe to searches, see what are the customer’s ‘Touch points’ (The Acupressuretheory), and Hit them, when the hammer is still Hot! Yupp! There you go, so you provide a service , just tailored to what your customers were looking it, that’s how you have the Viral Marketing in the B model.
So the more frequently you Rethink, the faster you analyse what is going on, and how should you build on it.
What if it doesn’t work out?
Well I have always believed in “How can something manage so well, not to work out someway, Someday.” The only hurdle here is, realising that it does demand a lot of patience leaving a plush job, and more that than the belief, ‘if god be with us, who shall be against us.’
Need to know, where to start, Wait for the sequel to this!
Stay Hungry,Stay foolish..
Stable is Stagnation..
Cheers,
Ekta Grover
Leaving a plush job, and setting out on the Road, is a double edged sword, if you don’t do it, You keep crying about it all your life (worse , When you are 60! ), and if you do , you always tend to rethink your decision, every time you find your self helpless, and pushing far beyond you should.
At one point of life you break, and say, ‘Ok I quit’ , if I don’t enjoy what I do, if I do not find it the least meaningful enough, then why do I go about it. I am a loser anyway, but this way if I were to quit, I would be a happy loser.
However, there a certain things that you need to be clear, and rethink, before you jump in the back water, and say, ‘I will learn to swim, someday’.
Here are some of these.
Analyze the alternatives
Before you decide to quit, have the alternatives. Be it the change of job, or your profile, the geographical ecosystem, it has to be meaningful. To the least, you should know, before and after one month of quitting the job, how do you make your ends meet, how do you earn your bread?
When will I break even, and when can I break?
The first break signifies, the Tipping point, where the venture ceases to be a self funded, the point from where one can expect the profits to come in. And the second break is, when do you say, “Boss I quit, it had all been foolish!”
How much do I need before I hit the Road?
Give yourself plenty of time, a realistic soft bound frame, to achieve this goal. Let there be Milestones, and let them be as realistic as possible, accommodating all the “What If”, or risk factors.
Do not overlook, even the slightest chance of possibilities where risk could seep into your B model.
Taking a simple case, say Mr X earns some 30 K per month, and his expenditures (The must spend-not avoidable) cumulate to 15 K a month. Assuming he has a calculated break even period of an Year, then this implies for his survival for a month he would need 15 K, so 12*15 =1.8 Lakhs is what he needs for one year to feed himself.
All in all, when you have that much money to support you till you ‘Break Even’, Quit, assuming you have done your Homework well. And you SOP is not some random out of the box, and back to the box thinking.
Is there a Gap that my ‘B Plan’/Venture/ Service could fill in, or is it just following an existing model of making money, which ‘seems’ to be a potential contender.
What are the customers needs, what my Ideal customer will be like, what will be his expectations from my service, What will differentiate me from my potential competitor, will I be my Core Competency, do I put in into a lot of things and hope something works (The Stock broker theory, as I would call it, putting your cash in different baskets, not all will/can be a loss!), or do I concentrate on one, and believe that How can it fail, if I am working this hard to get things done.
Networking
This is the key area which needs to be worked on. There are a plenty of things that can be done to spread the word around, Viral marketing, Partnering with another start up (The Barter System Theory, When you can Exchange services for service, need not be a monetary support at all) Trust me, when you are in the market, people are bound to get to notice you, provided you make your presence felt. Meeting up with like minded people and generating Ideas. Go with a fresh mind, and soon will you realise, may be, its time to rethink and put on a different Hat that you never wore for so long (The SIX thinking Hats theory , Edward De Bono)
Ideas, Never Run out of them
May be you have been thinking about it all this while, but nothing of the sort, out of the box, that’s where Stagnation creeps in, and then you know again, ‘I m Sick again’. Key in some RSS feeds, collect data from users feature request, or subscribe to searches, see what are the customer’s ‘Touch points’ (The Acupressuretheory), and Hit them, when the hammer is still Hot! Yupp! There you go, so you provide a service , just tailored to what your customers were looking it, that’s how you have the Viral Marketing in the B model.
So the more frequently you Rethink, the faster you analyse what is going on, and how should you build on it.
What if it doesn’t work out?
Well I have always believed in “How can something manage so well, not to work out someway, Someday.” The only hurdle here is, realising that it does demand a lot of patience leaving a plush job, and more that than the belief, ‘if god be with us, who shall be against us.’
Need to know, where to start, Wait for the sequel to this!
Stay Hungry,Stay foolish..
Stable is Stagnation..
Cheers,
Ekta Grover
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